By Fr Murray McDermott C.R.
Published in March 2017
I believe that there is a universal cry within the human heart to belong. Belonging is so important to the human heart and the human soul. When we feel that we belong, when we believe that we belong and when we are affirmed in our belonging, we can begin the journey of discovering that we are loveable, that we are beautiful and that we have a meaning and purpose in life.
I believe that an archetypal story that speaks to the issue of belonging can be found in the Bible in the Story of Noah and the Ark. God tells Noah that there is going to be a flood and that Noah needs to build an Ark if he is to survive. Noah builds the Ark and invites his family aboard along with two of every spices of animals that existed on earth. The skies became dark, a thunderous clamor shook the earth, the rains began to flow, and the winds blew in the strength of a gail. Noah’s Ark was tossed upon the water and rocked back and forth and up and down and around and around. But something wonderful happened. Noah and his wife and their children and their children’s children and the animals were all safe. For one and all, the Ark proved to be a place of safety, a place of refuge from the storm, a place of belonging where all were kept safe to live and love and belong.
This beautiful image of Noah’s Ark became a powerful metaphor for Jean Vanier when it came to naming the place of belonging for the family, the community that Jean would create for himself and two men, Raphael and Philippe, when he welcomed them from the institution for persons with intellectual disabilities. He named their first house, “L’Arche” and L’Arche is the French translation for the words “The Ark”. L’Arche would be for those who came to live there, a place of safety, a place of refuge from the storms of life, a place of belonging where all could discover their gifts, their talents, their abilities, their beauty, their wonder, the capacity to love and be loved.
How Jean Vanier Began L’Arche
So who is this Jean Vanier anyway? Well I begin, by telling you that he is the son of George Vanier one of the former Governor Generals of Canada. When he was 13, Jean asked his father for permission to join the navy. His father trusted Jean’s decision and gave him his permission. After a number of years in the navy Jean wanted more. He went to University and eventually earned his PhD in Philosophy writing about the Philosophy of Aristotle. In 1962 and 1963 Jean taught Philosophy at St. Michael’s University in Toronto. He liked teaching and the students enjoyed him as their professor. Jean noticed that the greatest concern of the students was getting high marks, doing good, and doing better and doing best was their goal.
During the summers of teaching, Jean went to Trolley France to be with his Spiritual Director, Pere Thomas, a Dominican Priest. Fr. Thomas had been made the chaplain at a place called “La Val Flurie”, which was a home for about 30 men with intellectual challenges. Jean discovered that these men had no particular interest in what Jean had in his head or what he could teach them; but rather, they desired to discover that which was in his heart. This profoundly moved Jean and the end result of this experience was that he gave up teaching University, moved to France, bought an old house and invited two men, Raphael and Phillipe, from a local asylum to come and live with him as brothers in Jesus, in the spirit of the Gospels. They named their home L’Arche or “the Ark”.
This L’Arche home would be a place of welcome, a place of hospitality and a place of deep belonging. Jean knew that in inviting Raphael and Phillipe that he was making a commitment for life. There was no going back. His plan was that the community would be no larger than the number of those who could fit into one of those French Puget cars, which can fit at a max four people. The following year the director and all the staff of the La Val Flurrie quit. To make a long story short, Jean became the director and unlocked the doors of the Val so all the men could go into the Village of Trolley and all hell broke out with the residents of Trolley. The good news is that there are now 147 L’Arche Communities in 35 countries of the world. L’Arche is a non-denominational and inter-religious community. The closest L’Arche Community is in Stratford, where I have belonged as a friend for 36 years.
Belonging and the Spirit
Now here is the Coles Notes Version of my life. I spent ten years in the seminary before I was ordained a priest. I entered the Seminary for a lot of good reasons and a lot of not good reasons. The constant question in my mind throughout those years was should I stay or should I leave. Well, I decided to stay, got ordained, and after I was ordained I felt that I made a mistake, got sick physically, emotionally, spiritually, got treatment and went on a leave of absence from the priesthood and my religious community. I worked for 13 and a half months as a security guard on the executive floors of the bank of Montreal, at First Canadian Place in Toronto for four dollars an hour, 60 hours a week. I sent out 125 resume’s and got hired as a Case Worker for the Perth County Children’s Aid Society in Stratford where I began working on Feb. 19, 1979 and ended up working there for 35 years. My first supervisor was the best friend of the founding director of L’Arche Stratford and when I came to supervision she kept encouraging me to meet L’Arche. I met L’Arche about a year later during the time of my supervisor’s death. I was invited to go on a pilgrimage to Lourdes the following spring during Holy Week, with members of the Stratford L’Arche Community. I began visiting L’Arche during their monthly Monday night masses. Then, the associate pastor who celebrated those masses was moved. I was asked to begin celebtrating mass for the community even though I was still on a leave of absence and I agreed to do so.
One of the most powerful moments of my life was the first night that I celebrated mass for L’Arche. The Chapel was a former living room and there were mattresses all around the room for people to sit on. There was a mattress in front of the altar where I sat. I will never forget getting vested for mass, coming into the chapel and sitting down and looking around the room at the faces of the people who had gathered. I remember beginning to laugh and laugh and laugh because it was the first moment in my life that I felt that I was at home in our world. I felt like I belonged. I sensed that it really didn’t matter to the people with intellectual disabilities or the core people, as we refer to them, if I would stay in the priesthood or leave. I sensed I belonged right here and right now, here in this place and space. It didn’t matter how stable or screwed up I was, because I sensed that I belonged. It didn’t matter what I preached or what I would say in my homily. They didn’t care. The only concern within the hearts of those who gathered was that I valued them by being there. I was with them and they were with me and we belonged together in this place of safety, this place of refuge from the storms and battles of life, this place of belonging which is called “The Ark” or L’Arche.
My ongoing journey would teach me that I had missed a lot about life and love and faith by about 11 inches which is the distance between my head and my heart. Jean Vanier tells us that we are a people conceived in relationship and born for relationship. Not only are we conceived in relationship and born for relationship; but we live relationship, we breath relationship, relationship is the essence of our lives.
Discovering Through Relationship
If you think about what Jean says, we discover that we learn to love through relationships. We discover that we are loved through relationship. We learn to forgive through relationships. We grow through relationships, we problem solve through relationships. We discover life’s deepest meaning and purpose through relationships. We discover hope through relationships. We come to faith through relationship.
Now the short story is that I probably would not be a priest today had it not been for L’Arche. It is the spirituality of L’Arche that nourishes my life, my heart my spirit and my soul. Jean says that it is the poor have a privileged way of entering into the heart of Jesus the heart of the Gospel and the heart of the Church. My experience is that it is the poor of L’Arche and the poor of God’s world who continue to break open my heart to hear and preach the Gospel.
I fell asleep one night at the United Church during Taise Prayer which is a repetitive type prayer. Our Stratford L’Arche community used to go there once a month. It was during the ten minute private reflection time that I feel asleep. However, I not only fell asleep, I began to snore. The core people in my house never let me forget it. At the supper table, Pat, one of our Core people who can speak but one word at a time, would say in the midst of our supper meal, “Murray” and then he would make a snoring sound to which all would join in pretending to snore and then laugh and laugh. Night after night I was reminded of my folly. How much better can it get, knowing you are at home, that you belong and that you are loved? L’Arche continues to be for me home for my heart and home for my soul, a home for my spirit and a home for my being.
My gratitude to one and all for listening to my story. Congratulations to each of you graduating this evening. I wish you all the best in all of your futures!
Father Murray McDermott C.R. has recently retired from the Stratford Children’s Aid, he has been a member of L’Arche Homes Stratford and is a priest to the University Campus Ministry. Murray is now serving as Provincial Superior of the Congregation of the Resurrection. This speech was the Commencement Address delivered at The Working Centre on November 16, 2016 to the combined graduating classes of the Diploma in Local Democracy Class and the Humanities 101 from Renison University College.
