By Margaret Nally
Published in June 2019
Editor’s Note: The memorial for Shirley Gutenberg was held at St. John’s Kitchen on May 10th after her sudden and unexpected death on April 22, 2019. Memorials are a way to reflect on those in the St. John’s Kitchen community who have died. Since November, over 30 people have been remembered at three different memorials.
At the start of Shirley’s memorial, a gathering of about 40 people, Sara came into the dining hall where the memorial was taking place and whispered to Rhonda, one of the nurses, and then Amanda an outreach worker left, and soon after Gayle the Nurse Practitioner was motioned to, and Nikki seeing the commotion left along with Tom and Andrew. They were all doing what the outreach and medical team have been doing at St. John’s Kitchen all winter, responding to two overdoses. These ones involved some heavy drugs and the two individuals were in and out of consciousness with EMS coming and leaving.
As the memorial continued, Tom came back and offered his remembrance adding that Shirley was a master at handling such commotion and would have seen the beauty and necessity of supporting those with drug addictions. Patrons and fellow workers paid tribute to Shirley as a foundation of the St. John’s Clinic work.
Shirley will be greatly missed in all the community spaces, like hospital, prison, outreach places, in fact, everywhere her unending kindness and generosity of spirit was shared as she moved, and worked with people in places of pain, bringing healing and wholeness to situations.
We have known Shirley and we honour that she was a woman unique and mysterious. As the late Jean Vanier reminds us we cannot work in an inclusive way with people without acknowledging a power beyond ourselves. And Shirley lived and modeled a life with a deep resonance and understanding that for her there was a deeper reality where hope and beauty resides and where human life lived in dignity and respect when honoured.
Shirley’s Catholic heritage speaks to that reality and these words from the Book of Wisdom (4:7-14) were spoken at her funeral Mass:
The virtuous woman, though she dies before her time, will find rest
Length of days is not what makes age honorable.
Or the number of years the true measure of life.
She has sought to please God, so God has loved her.
Red-haired Shirley was wife to Fritz, mother to Gillian and Gareth and their spouses, grandmother, stepmother, sister, friend and was a bright spirit to all. Shirley was born 75 years ago in Saskatchewan, received her nursing training in Alberta and lived life on a broad scale both here and in Florida.
Shirley was one of those special beings that transcend boundaries of many definitions such as age – she was ageless. She was able to show deep love and connection across generations and circumstances. A bright red car carried her on her many jaunts around town and people smiled as she passed by – a busy, focused woman on her journey. And she was never, never too busy to stop and spend time with anyone who needed her time and attention.
Her bright red nails and hair showing her determination to be her own person and to be a force to be dealt with. Backpack toting, Shirley is remembered as someone with a forthright manner. Shirley called a spade A SPADE. She told you when she felt enough was enough. Who could challenge her when her words were soaked with a deep love and connection to people?
There is a landscape to our city and everyone who moves through the streets adds colour, warmth and vibrancy. We notice the bold, bright, the beautiful and the broken and Shirley tended to all…Shirley taught us about community and how to walk with focus and intentionality together and urged us to be a better community, to honour each other’s participation, to see meaning, purpose and gift as we create ways of respectful engagement on the sidewalks and all spaces in the city.
